Contemplative Kick in the A$$

FOOD

Yesterday I had Ezekiel toast with Daiya cream cheeze and sliced tomatoes for breakfast. It was a few hours after I woke up, so having something a little hearty was fine. I really can’t handle meals well in the morning. Smoothies are fine, but that’s as heavy as I like to eat for at least a few hours.

Lunch was a catered thing at work. And bless my admin who always insists on vegan eats for me. We are restricted to ordering from in house catering services, so my selections are non existent. Last time, they seriously thought feta cheese would be fine in my wrap, so needless to say, I brought my own eats just in case. I stopped at the grocery on the way in and picked up a container of berries and a DIY salad.

And as you can see – the vegan option was about a pound of hummus with a couple cucumber chunks on a soggy wrap. I do appreciate the effort, but after a single bite, I was just glad I had backup eats.

Didn’t end up having dinner – wasn’t hungry.

This morning was a smoothie for breakfast on the way into the office for an early meeting. Water, Vega vanilla, frozen blueberries, & spinach.

Lunch was soup and salad from Whole Foods, and dinner was a simple salad at home.

FITNESS

Went for a run yesterday before work. It was chilly so I had to bundle up. And of course it started raining just as I hit my halfway point, so I was a bit cold and wet by the time I got home, but that’s okay. Still felt really good. My right calf is still sore, and I honestly don’t know why. Started hurting about 5 weeks ago or so. And while it’s not painful, it’s not normal either. I don’t recall pulling anything, so it’s baffling. First few minutes of the run yesterday were really tender, but it got a bit better as I went. Will keep an eye on it and see how it does over the next few weeks.

Getting warm and caffeinated before my run

LIFE

How much can happen in 2 days since we last chatted, right? And truth is, not a whole lot. They’ve been good days so I can’t complain. All fine on the work front, and with it being a short week, that’s always nice. Got to see my guy briefly each day, which always makes me happy. Kids are doing well, though R’s wrist is still really hurting. She has an evaluation for physical therapy next Tuesday. Hope it helps.

I have 3 contractors lined up this week to give me estimates on my downstairs powder room. Hopefully it’s not horrible news!

Also the #becomingamorningperson is trucking along. Been getting up at 530. Start with meditation, then coffee and some reading and chatting with my guy. Yesterday was a run, then work. Today was straight to work. So far, so good!

If I have to title the past two days it would be ‘contemplative’. I mentioned a few posts ago about being in a bit of a funk. And that’s totally gone, but what is left is some analysis about why I was in the funk in the first place. I’ve thought a lot about that, and I have some theories. But, need to give a bit of background first.

I’ve lived a lot of my adult life by the 5 year rule. Meaning, I make a 5 year plan, execute it, and then make another one. It’s how I work towards goals. My last 5 year plan got interrupted about 6 months early. In 2017 I was to finish my MBA, start a new job, and then create a new 5 year plan. Well, I finished the MBA. Had a bunch of job offers. And then got divorced. In the end, the divorce has been a very good thing for both of us, but it has left me without something to work towards, and that makes me feel really lost. I had this conversation with my friend M when we met for coffee a week and a half ago, and he’s very much in the same place. Don’t get me wrong, there are certain things about my future of which I am very certain and excited, but those are personal and academic goals. I spend way too much time trying to think of what my “next” is career wise, and I can’t see a path, and that both annoys and frightens me. It has also infected my attitude about certain things, and I can’t abide by that anymore. I am an overall happy and optimistic person who very much loves my life, and so to feel this sense of negativity for any length of time just, frankly, pisses me off. So once the funk faded and I spend some time analyzing it’s real origins, I have come to a couple conclusions. (You’re excited, I can tell).

1 – I don’t HAVE to know today what I want my career to look like in 5 years. It’s okay to take the time to figure it out. I’ve decided to give myself a year because a lot can happen in that time.

2 – if I want to change anything about my life, then it’s up to me to do it.

3 – I’m honestly very happy with where I am. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, but it’s also not all horrible either. And I am fully capable of reframing my damned attitude about it.

4 – all of the good in my life FAR exceeds anything that’s frustrating or less than perfect. I lost sight of that perspective for a few weeks to a degree, and after a swift kick in my own ass (hey, I do yoga, it can happen), I’ve decided to readjust said attitude.

So there ya go. Crissie’s Guide to Attitude Readjustment!

And look – lazy Kuma pics just for fun 🙂

MY YEAR OF LESS

I’m excited – I was able to get bookshelves and a chair for my study and got wicked deals on them. The chair should arrive tomorrow and the bookshelves next Tuesday! WOO.

Otherwise, just groceries. $33 at Lidl for the majority of what I needed, and another $30 at Whole Foods. All set for the holiday weekend!

Published by

RunCrissieRun

I am a 45 yo busy career single mom and doctoral student attempting to find her inner athlete, be a gluten-free(ish) vegan, and find a way to balance it all without going crazy! I love to cook, read, run, box, do yoga, dance, travel, and learn as many new things as I can - which often gets me in trouble.... I am passionate about life in general, and if I didn't write about it, I'd probably implode.

8 thoughts on “Contemplative Kick in the A$$

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s